Help!!! My girlfriend is dull and uninteresting

Girlfriend Issues

Dear Gabriel

,

I’m a young man in his early twenties. I’ve been going out with this particular girl for close to a year now.

I can tell that she loves me, and don’t get me wrong I love her too, I mean she’s very beautiful and well endowed in the right places, she’s also a good cook and good in bed. But my worry is that she’s too obtuse and uninteresting. Whenever we’re having a conversation or discussion she doesn’t make meaningful contributions to the topic, sometimes her contributions are not well thought out and when she says them it makes her sound dumb. My friends have even given her a nickname ‘mumu’. Whenever they want to ask of her, they be like “CharlieĀ® that your mumu girlfriend dey”?

I am kinda afraid to introduce her to my parents so she won’t embarrass me. My parents are very particular about the kind of girl I bring home, and trust my dad he’s going to bombard her with a barrage of questions. She’s also not interested in global happenings around the world or within the country or even recent developments. What really sparked my ire was our just concluded Nigerian elections. I remember calling her and teasing her as to who will win the elections, Buhari/Atiku, but I was dismayed by her response ” who is Atiku?” I was totally dumbfounded, how can someone who isn’t an illiterate not have an inkling about ‘atiku’.

I’m not saying i know all about the elections, I wasn’t even interested in the ‘Nigerian’ elections because I already knew it was all mere propaganda, but nevertheless I kept up to speed.
Her further response killed my vibe “what concern me with Atiku? Is he going to give me a role as a telemundo actress?”(she’s obsessed with telemundo by the way,which brings me to my next point)
She so much loves telemundo and zee world, the only concise narration she can give is the breakdown of an episode of zee world.

It’s breaks my heart because I love her and want to marry her in the nearest future, and I don’t want our kids to turn out to be morons.
Conversations with her are so boring, she basically adds nothing to the topic of discussion. Our time together is mostly spent on long silences

I need only positive responses please…

2 comments

  1. Tran Lisena - Reply

    Nowadays it’s very rare to come across an article like this. And it’s even rarer that I read a full article without getting bored. I read this one beginning to end. Brilliant!

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